When I was diagnosed 4 years ago I never thought I would of been taken this journey, I thought just take the antibiotics and everything would be done and over with. I also thought Lyme Disease was the illness that would never get better. I am still in treatment for Bartonella a nasty bacterial infection ticks also carry. It makes my hands, feet and face feel like they are red hot on fire for no reason. I don't sleep well and I get cranky more than I would like from feeling so darn uncomfortable. I have been off any heavy treatment for a while and now just using herbs to kill this stubborn Bartonella. Sometimes I wonder if I will ever truly "recover" fully from this Late Stage Lyme and Co-infection's. I am fortunate that Lyme led me to my Celiac diagnosis and now after close to two years on it I have gained 15lbs and yes that's a really good thing. I weighed 97lbs for a long time and barely had any strength to do anything. I can now walk a few miles a week outside treatment and homeschool my 7 year old son. I am grateful for my progress so far but this Bart, feeling on fire thing is for the birds! I just want to get out of my own skin and there is just no relief. The Byron White's Abart formula must be doing something because my skin is improving and the bacteria seems to be talking back. Its like an internal argument between Bartonella and the news herbs. Well yes the Bart. doesn't want to vacate the premises. On top of this my chemical allergies are really bad and my immune response is kicking into high gear. So its like having allergies, an auto-immune disorder with a side of nasty bacteria. Needless to say I am a hot mess, I am not even into the holiday spirit really. By 5pm I am fatigued and I find myself falling asleep in the rocking chair near our warm wood stove. Not a good thing when you have a busy son who likes to torture cats for a living :) LOL I am glad I have one layer to work on right now but I'd rather being somewhat normal and walk a few miles a week and keep up instead of feeling like a slug or a bump on a log. That's the trick with this illness, you are on a constant up and down. I keep getting upper jaw pain for some reason on this treatment. It feels swollen for no reason or its like a nerve pain. I really don't like that part. Now if I could sleep through the night that would be great! Not to mention finishing Christmas shopping, wrapping, stuffing stockings, I am getting tired thinking of it all. I can say this year I was able to do something for my Lyme friends and others by sending out 50 home made cards. It really does the soul good to do for others. And I do have some wonderful friends in the homeschooling community, Lyme community, and now Twitter. My body might fall apart but I have friends for the journey and I am very lucky to have that. I just wish this whole treatment, supplements, pills, shots, blood draws could be done. I think its normal to want to have better stable health. Its a God given right for as I am concerned. It breaks my heart that more and more people I meet have chronic illness and their doctors don't know why. It drives me crazy. I wouldn't wish these past 4 years on anyone. I just hope this current herbal medicine kicks this Bartonella in the teeth and I am able to move forward towards full recovery if that is possible.